A week from now.....
Tuesday, 9 February 2010
I can't believe it's the forth month I've been in the UK!! At the momment I still cannot get the fact I have to wake up and open my eyes facing the life I had before, being alone and be away from him! Everything is very complicated at the moment, nor I or he are ready for being together forever yet. We still have to prepare ourselves if we want to be together for long time.
I'm taking a deep breath everytime I looked at him while he's sleeping trying to memorize the way he smiled at me, the shape of his nose, the way he licked his lips, how he stared me gently. I will remember all the arguing we made, all the love we gave, and all the laughs we had. This UK visit has changed me so much, and i now realized how much I love him, I am thankful that I didnt make decision to leave him. He's all I have.
Although it's hard for me to leave this country, I am realized that I really have to get away from it. For everything that have enriched me, I am now ready to come back to, once again, rebuild my future and be the better person again and again. I've found what I've been looking for so long, I've found my belief. I am now the new me, ready to conquer the world and make it better, then later, when I and he are ready for our new us, we will be reunited. For the better us, for the better love.
I love you lots....
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